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#dating
Connecting with people shouldn’t feel like a battle.
The problem with straight #dating...
Art by
@stuart_cb 
https://www.girlonthenet.com/blog/i-volunteer-as-tribute-the-problem-with-straight-dating/
I deleted the first draft of this blog and rewrote the whole thing this afternoon. *That* is how keen I am to build bridges rather than chuck rocks.
Sorry if it's a bit clumsy, but I hope you get what I'm trying to say.
(she/her) @Polywog@lgbtqia.space"Don't you ever feel lonely and jealous when your partner's out on a date and you're not?"
Haha, oh, my sweet summer child.
You underestimate what a treat it is to spend a night by myself, eating pizza bagels & watching Studio Ghibli, with absolutely no need to entertain anyone else.
Don't get me wrong -- I love my partners! But I love them a heck of a lot more when I get to be away from them sometimes.
Society expects us to live in each others' pockets, and to spend very little time alone. But for an introvert like me? Time all by myself, unobserved and unaccompanied, is an absolute necessity.
I love knowing that my more-extroverted partner is out getting their social needs met, while I'm having my delightful goblin-time.
Most of this is word-for-word, but there's some truncation in the conversation for the comic format, and one added line from me since I didn't actually hear her laughing at the time.
I love you @MavenAndFriends ! Thank you for everything.
Longer description for how and why this came to be on my FA and Eka's submissions.
Psychologie: Wie digitale Medien unsere Beziehungen prägen
Menschen interagieren auf Social Media, Internet-Plattformen und mit Chatbots. Diese digitalen Beziehungen haben immer mehr Einfluss darauf, wie wir unsere Beziehungen im realen Leben führen. Von A. Braun.
“[Japanese men] always tell me it’s so cool that they’re with a foreigner or that I speak English,” Kane says. “A lot of times you meet people and they say let’s go to a hotel, let’s go have fun. They say western women have a reputation for being easy.”
Fellow #adhd singles, do you tell your dates about ADHD? If yes? At what point? What are your experiences?
Red-hot #dating advice from my Mum which I might actually start using...
"Maybe you should only ever agree to a second date after you've asked the man if he can tell you 3 things he's learnt about you during the evening."
Some of you have been eagerly awaiting part 2 of my test date with Jack. HERE IT IS!
The conclusion: love yourself before you start #dating. You'll know you're ready to #date when you can accept rejection with a shrug and 'your loss!'.
(pls share if you like it!)
https://www.girlonthenet.com/blog/love-yourself-test-date-2/
YAY! Someone said their library bought Pass the Salt! https://share.libbyapp.com/title/10584475 #Books #EBooks #EBook #Library #Libraries #Gay #Dating #Disability @bookstodon @reading
Somewhat ironically, because it's such a common trope, folk that say "Oh my God", is a cringe factor for me. In other words, a signal that they're not informed. But yeah, that may come across as a bit judgey. To be clear, it's more that, for me, when folk say "OMG!", l perceive that as virtue signaling (saying OMG is wrong, but it's not bad)
All In The Mind: The ick: #dating, disgust and #evolutionary #psychology
Episode webpage: https://www.abc.net.au/listen/programs/allinthemind/the-ick-dating-disgust-evolutionary-psychology/104948536
I don't know how to flirt but I DO know how to cook so imma just feed people and see how that works out.
I'm feeling increasingly out of place on dating sites, these profiles are like "I'm a super adventurous person, very ambitious and always smiling! Never a dull moment! Who wants to travel the world with me?"
That sounds exhausting.. I just wanna hang out with some kindhearted lazy fatso nerd who's as miserable as me.. someone to relate to..
Genuinely blown away by how popular this post has been. Now that the internet is becoming more hostile to adult content, maybe I should pivot to #dating advice. I have lots to say!
Part 2 will go up on Wednesday next week - subscribe at the bottom of this post for updates.
I didn't expect any men to take me up on my offer of doing a test #date for feedback but... someone did!
Meet Jack! And learn some fun stuff about #dating along the way: how to write a great first message, why positivity is key, and more...
I'd love this to get a lot of shares. It's SFW and I think genuinely helpful - some of Jack's mistakes are ones many make on #dating sites, and I have given useful advice on how to avoid making them. Especially proud of 'compliment, connect, question'. Make your first message stand out, innit.
![Compliment something on their profile, connect with them over it, then ask a question.
I love [name of band they have mentioned] and I saw them at a gig back in February! Amazing live act, would love to go again – possibly my gig of the year? What’s the best gig you went to last year?
Genuinely laughed out loud at your Monopoly joke, I’m also a bit of a board game nerd – that one’s my nemesis when there are so many better ones out there. Do you have a favourite? Any new ones I should check out?
That picture of you on a clifftop is iconic. I’m really into hiking too. Where was that photo taken and how long did it take you to get up there?](https://files.mastodon.social/media_attachments/files/114/109/636/627/056/381/original/f817bd0698394047.png "Compliment something on their profile, connect with them over it, then ask a question.
I love [name of band they have mentioned] and I saw them at a gig back in February! Amazing live act, would love to go again – possibly my gig of the year? What’s the best gig you went to last year?
Genuinely laughed out loud at your Monopoly joke, I’m also a bit of a board game nerd – that one’s my nemesis when there are so many better ones out there. Do you have a favourite? Any new ones I should check out?
That picture of you on a clifftop is iconic. I’m really into hiking too. Where was that photo taken and how long did it take you to get up there?")
"It’s hard to put yourself out there. It’s a challenge to be vulnerable. But you do have to do it if you want to get a date."
NEW BLOG! Remember when I said I'd do test #dates with blog readers & give feedback? Someone volunteered!
Meet Jack!
🅻🅸🅲🅴 (
) @alice@lgbtqia.spaceHey, I found this really cool trick to find out if someone is into you!
Ask them.
*Literal conversation from yesterday*
Alice: Hi, it's Alice from the deescalation training.
Instructor: so wonderful to meet you
Alice: Likewise 
...
Alice: Quick question so my brain doesn't keep poking me about it: are flirty or friendly to you?
(I'm happy either way 
)
Instructor: Hope your brain wasn't too pokey all night! They could go either way, I'm looking forward to that drink to find out ;)
Alice: Perfect. Ttyl
---
Poof! It's like magic 
Though I may have taken the wrong message away from the deescalation training 
---
Update: two dates later and I'm pretty sure the s were flirty... Also I think I've got a new boyfriend 
have you experienced "floodlighting" or are someone who floodlights? while the article deems it as a toxic dating trait, i'm curious what other people think about it. #dating
https://www.vice.com/en/article/floodlighting-is-the-new-toxic-dating-trend/
#Hinge launches a new feature for daters to privately share details with matches