R3D R0T<p>You ever feel like you're handling a tough month surprisingly well and then hear some bad news that's a little too relevant and realize that actually you've barely been able to shower and haven't properly cleaned your bedsheets, your clothes or yourself in weeks? 🙃 ... </p><p>Anyways, I guess feeling mostly numb and a little bit on-edge is much better than it could be going at its worst. I just wish I could skip the winter holidays, or at least not have to think at all during this time. It's good though that I'm realizing this, because I'm more rejection-sensitive when I'm in this state of mind, so at the very least I can catch myself more easily when I'm overthinking a social interaction or catastrophizing a situation. </p><p>It's whatever. I'm just pissed because I ate, had water, even masturbated and still today that annoying pit in my stomach remains. 🫤 Maybe I'm just feeling worse over time because I keep getting asked at work what I'm doing for the holidays this year and, much like every year, the real answer is "being sad" lol. </p><p><a href="https://denden.world/tags/RxdRxt" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>RxdRxt</span></a> <a href="https://denden.world/tags/RxdRxtRants" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>RxdRxtRants</span></a> <a href="https://denden.world/tags/Rant" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>Rant</span></a> <a href="https://denden.world/tags/TxtPst" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#<span>TxtPst</span></a></p>